Wrap it up
It’s the end of the year as we know it and I feel pretty good.* The time in between Christmas and New Year’s always feels so weird to me. I never know what day it is, rules don’t seem to apply (Candy with lunch? Sure! TV in your room? Absolutely! Consume 37 pounds of cheese? You bet!), and everything is just a little removed from reality. This year it also marks the unofficial end to my sabbatical. When Leo goes back to school, I go back to my email and lose the (slight) buffer sabbatical offered in terms of how I spent my time. That is a bummer but I did have an opportunity to do some things I have never done before:
Write a blog
Make several gallons of hot chocolate at once
Decorate a classroom door ➔
Play bingo in Spanish with a bunch of first graders
Read for fun
Create a book proposal
Go to Joshua Tree right before Thanksgiving
Now that it’s back to “normal” I thought I should revisit what I hoped to accomplish this semester. Back in August I laid out some fairly specific goals with the caveat that I was going to cut myself some slack (not my norm). So here is what I had on my list and the results:
Weekly or bi-weekly blog posts on academically-adjacent ideas about the invisible burdens on women @ work and tightroping: This is my fortieth blog and the only time I didn’t post on my Tuesday/Thursday schedule was Thanksgiving. I strayed a bit from work as a topic at times and went into parenting, mental health, why Elon Musk is terrible, teaching, and other random topics but it was fun. Hearing from people I have never met that a post resonated with them was honestly the highlight of this process.
Monthly blog posts where I rant about how Sheryl Sandberg sold us all a lie and that leaning in is a bunch of bullshit and/or stories about my son: I really only went in on Sheryl once (#noshitsheryl)** but I feel like there was consistent Leo content. That kid is a content machine. After taking him to the KSB holiday party a few weeks ago I said “Thank you for being my plus 1 to the party tonight.” He replied, “You mean your plus FUN!!” That’s golden. He should have his own blog. Once he learns how to read and type-watch out!!Six or seven completed book chapters: Well… I spent a lot of time editing the three that are complete and started three other ones but they are nowhere near complete. I did more research. I outlined stuff. But they are a very far cry from complete.
An additional dog: Mango San Carlos has been with us for several months now. He has learned to bark at anyone who dares walk on our street or deliver anything to our house from his brother Mr. Crenshaw Sniffers. They are the best of buddies and play bitey face all day long.
A book contract with an actual company so that I don’t have to make hard copies of what I write to give as gifts: Did not happen. I had a few nibbles. I spent a lot of time figuring out who publishes what I am working on, if they are accepting queries, what information they want, and then tweaking my proposal accordingly. It felt a lot like applying to college. Everyone wanted something slightly different. All in all I sent my proposal to six agencies and nine agents. Some were kind enough to say no thank you but many went into an internet black hole. Sigh.
In revisiting my goals I also realized the things I accomplished that I didn’t plan to:
Almost done writing a case study on the mezcal industry in Oaxaca. I met with an editor at Ivey Publishing who thinks it would be a great fit for their case collection and asked that I submit it when it’s finished.
Wrote and submitted a proposal to a conference about how to discuss cultural appropriation in the context of a business ethics class via an exercise/project.
Worked with the amazing April Cash to raise $$$ for the students in the majors and minors in the Management department. We talked to alumni, students, and random passersby during the Homecoming tailgate hyping all the awesome support we offer our students.
Started a new research project on Egoism with my favorite co-author Ed Love that will yield at least one paper (and maybe more). It will also likely anger philosophers who refuse to measure anything.
For a while I was sad and disappointed in myself because I couldn’t make the book happen. The day of three rejections was particularly shitty. But then I had to step back and think about why I wanted to write the book in the first place. What does a book actually get me? In my mind a book was a checkmark in my favor to the world outside of academia. It was a thing you can buy/hold that represents a publisher seeing enough promise in my work to fund it; thus giving me credibility. But then I remembered that I actually have credibility! At the moment it doesn't happen to be in the “right” places (i.e. industry) but that is something I can work on. I guess I realized that the book wasn’t the point. The book was a means to the end of reaching women and addressing things that matter to them. A book gets me into the literal hands of women which (hopefully) gets me into the doors of their companies to have conversations that drive change. But maybe the blog can do that too? You can’t hold it (unless you print it but please don’t do that because that’s not environmentally friendly at all), but you can forward a link, and maybe that link ends up with someone who wants to have a conversation, and maybe that conversation leads to me getting into those doors and in front of more women. There are a lot of ways to get to the same goal so I’m going to keep doing what I am doing and see what happens. Please know that if someone emails tomorrow with interest in the book I wouldn’t say no (!) I just now have a bit more clarity that a book is only one way to have an impact.
Over the next few days I need to figure out what’s next for #tightroping and the blog. I also need to think about the bigger picture for 2023 and how everything fits together. I can say for certain that this is the most fun I have ever had writing and it makes me happy. Plus, I still have a running list of topics and general angst and they all need an outlet! Now I just have to figure out how to make it all work. I also need to remind myself (like I did in August) to cut myself some slack. Right before the holidays there was a great HBR article on Self-Compassion. It revisits some of the things I said back in August. Mainly that we can be really hard on ourselves. We hold ourselves to levels of perfectionism that are simply unattainable and then beat ourselves up for not reaching them. I don’t want to do that anymore. That approach sucks the joy out of so many experiences. For this last post of the year I want to leave you with the three elements of self-compassion. We all deserve to treat ourselves as well as we treat those around us.
Feeling pretty psyched about 2023. Happy New Year!
*Yes, that is a play on the spectacular R.E.M. song It’s the End of the World as We Know It from 1987. Here is the link to the song but I highly suggest you take several minutes of your life and watch the truly chaotic video. Yes, I still know every word. Also, I had this poster in my room in high school. My grandma yelled at me about it because she thought it said “fuck” and not “Buck.”
**I had mini stickers made with this on them. Email me and I will send you some. Seriously.